Semester’s coming to an end…
It’s April 26th, 2006. Happy Birthday Shin!
My spring semester is coming to an end in about 2 weeks time. Time flies. Seemed like I was just here not long ago, still remembering the fresh details of when I first got here. All the unfamiliarity & awe. Really enjoyed the time when we were relaxing, a week before the spring semester started. Just plain leisure & fun. No worries about assignments, readings, group meetings etc. Taking our own sweet time to everything… Very soon i’ll have that chnace again. Very very soon. But before that i’ll have to go through a "death" session filled with assignments n finals n presentations. Let me see… I have a lit review due on next Monday & i’m hardly half way through it (was given the whole sem to do it & i super procrastinated; then again, i didn’t cos there were tonnes of things to do through out the sem). Then, I have Personality Finals on that week’s Friday. 2 big papers & 1 presentation due on the Monday after that. ARM paper n presentation due on the subsequent Wednesday. Dead? Sure thing! Everything just had to cram towards the end. Sigh… By then it’ll be the 10th of May. Have to shift our things to the new house either on the 11th or 12th & on the 13th, off to Minneapolis we go. N of cos the day, we depart with out seniors… *sob sob*
Things are getting better now. I’m well aware that i need to find a balance between reality and optimism. I know i was too rigid. I guess I wasn’t mature enuf to handle the messiness n ugliness of life. And another thing is that there are consequences that come with changes, whether they are negative or positive or whether it was anticipated or not. I think it was quite a blow to the ppl that i’m close with to see my drastic change in my thoughts, my philosophy of life. Disappointment especially… These changes can be good n they can be bad, if they are at the extremes. So, that’s wat i mean by balancing them out. Setting a "qualifier" so that i don go beyond wat i’m capable of coping…
I do think that love is fragile and we, humans, are weaklings that allow ourselves to fall into that trap of fragileness. Love is not a fairytale where a particualr prince of charming just comes into ur life n scoops u up in his strong arms, providing u all the security in the world…. BUT, I believe that love is ONLY fragile if we ALLOW it to be. If we want the love to strengthen, we can. If we want it to last, it can then last. We can if we want to! Effort is needed in order to build security. No fruits come without labor. I’m not all that negative cos i believe that there’s hope if I continue believing that there is…
I love Khoo Hau Chun!
… Thats all for now… Gotta continue with assignment… Sad life…
